Without him, it is impossible
A lot has happened since my last diary entry, I overcame
that day and yielded to temptation the next. That made me really frustrated and
disappointed with myself, I mean how could I? After so much effort not to. Ever
heard of the saying it is better NOT TO BEGIN than to stop. It is not after
these last few months that I really understood the depth of that quote. We are
truly our worst enemy. Having to unlearn what your brain and body has
registered as normal….huuu that is one battle most tough to conquer, isn’t it?.
Your habits become second nature, they make up who you are. Either public or
private, good or bad whether done consciously or unconsciously, they are all
you? And it is not going to take a miracle to learn the good ones, or be
conscious of the bad….it needs your 100% effort and commitment combined with
God and trust in his transforming power. Guess that’s what the Lord wanted me
to learn these past months. That on my own, am just going to keep trying, but
not get anywhere as long am not doing it with him.
With my own efforts in absence of his power, I will never
conquer. Human effort alone is void, hence the bible says “…with men it is
impossible, but not with God: for with God all things are possible” (Mat 19:26)
Men cannot attain divine success without divine power. We can certainly try,
but will fail. At times we will believe we have accomplished but when the
floods and winds come, like the house built on the sand we will fall… and great
will be our fall (Mat 7:26-27). Our efforts need to be surrendered to God’s
power. Him alone has the power to CREATE a clean heart and RENEW the right
spirit within us. We should be grateful when the Holy Spirit has convicted us
of our wrong habits, but not dare to think we can convert ourselves if we tried
hard enough. He made you aware, he will change you – you just have to be
willing.
I have done this so many times unawares. I would wake up in
the morning, determined to do this and not that. Try to change my habits and
re-direct my thoughts. I became successful for a while and I thought I had
progressed. However, it is true without God, we can do nothing. Because when
tests and trials came, all my ‘progress’ came crumbling down because of a lack
of concrete foundation. Prayer and God’s guidance is needed to perfect your
efforts.
I am grateful for the experience that the Lord has taught
me. You see I always knew that without God men cannot do anything, However I don’t
think I really understood it until recently. And now I absolutely believe it
because I have seen how my weakness is made perfect in HIS strength and that
through HIM I am more than I conqueror. It is all about letting HIM be the
coach, and you being an active player and only then will you not only score,
but score in the correct goal post.
Therefore I begin this day with thanksgiving for God’s patience
towards me and gratitude for his everlasting love that enables me to transform into
his likeness daily through grace. It is humbling to know that more than
anything else, the Lord only desires my will to work out HIS in my life. And
as I prayerfully fight daily to give it, I be not discouraged knowing that ‘’I can do
things through Christ who strengthens me” (Phil 4:13)
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